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Top 100 Messages

1. They came for the Communists, and I didn't object For I wasn't a Communist;
They came for the Socialists, and I didn't object - For I wasn't a Socialist;
They came for the labor leaders, and I didn't object - For I wasn't a labor leader;
They came for the Jews, and I didn't object - For I wasn't a Jew;
Then they came for me - And there was no one left to object."

-- Martin Niemoller
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2. Interesting Fact:

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch procejt at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosnt mttaer waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
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3. "Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting."

-- Karl Wallenda
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4. Ni! Vote

5. "The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad."

-- Salvador Dali
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6. "All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand."

-- Steven Wright
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7. "If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."

-- Alice Roosevelt Longworth
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8. Scientific Fact:

Time slows down near a black hole; inside it stops completely.
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9. "I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."

-- Groucho Marx
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10. "I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

-- Thomas Alva Edison
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11. I paid $1 and all I got was to spread this shitty message to the world! Vote

12. "We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction."

-- General Douglas MacArthur
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13. "As long as there are innocent nickels to be made from the gullible, Python-starved public, I shall be out there dressed in silly frocks and singing filthy lyrics. I'm coming your way in search of ancient dollars."

-- Eric Idle
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14. "In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known."

-- Thomas Pickering
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15. "I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a good book."

-- Groucho Marx
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16. "God, please save me from your followers!"

-- Bumper Sticker
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17. Strange Fact:

During an average lifetime, a man will spend 3,350 hours removing 8.4 meters of stubble.
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18. "I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of another boy."

-- Woody Allen
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19. Strange Fact:

It is estimated that millions of trees in the world are accidentally planted by squirrels who bury nuts and then forget where they hid them.
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20. "Military justice is to justice what military music is to music."

-- Groucho Marx
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21. "Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."

-- Napoleon Bonaparte
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22. Happy Birthday Mom!

- Love, your daughter Cherry
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23. I am so sick of traffic. People need to learn how to drive or get the hell off the roads. Do you ever feel like no one around you even has a driver's license? Vote

24. "We are shaped by our thoughts, we become what we think."

-- Buddha
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25. "Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry."

-- Mark Twain
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26. Strange Fact:

London police photographed the eyes of Jack the Ripper's victims because they thought his image might be recorded in them.
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27. "Boy, those French, they have a different word for everything!"

-- Steve Martin
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28. Strange Fact:

Your eyes are always the same size from birth but your nose and ears never stop growing.
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29. The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

-- Steven Wright
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30. "I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because
I hate plants."

-- A. Whitney Brown
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31. "The most radical revolutionary will become a conservative the day after the revolution."

-- Hannah Arendt
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32. "The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast. The chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."

-- Unknown
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33. "The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows."

-- Aristotle Onassis
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34. Strange Fact:

If you are standing on a mountain top and the conditions are just right you can see a lit match from 50 miles away.
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35. Interesting Fact:

Bill Gates' first business was Traff-O-Data, a company that created machines which recorded the number of cars passing a given point on a road.
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36. "94.5% of all statistics are made up."

-- Woody Allen
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37. Strange Fact:

J. Edgar Hoover liked to fire FBI agents whose palms were sweaty when shaking hands.
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38. "I date this girl for two years -- and then the nagging starts: 'I wanna know your name...'"

-- Mike Binder
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39. "It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried."

-- Sir Winston Churchill
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40. "A girl phoned me the other day and said 'Come on over, there's nobody home'. I went over. Nobody was home."

-- Rodney Dangerfield
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41. "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."

-- Henny Youngman
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42. Strange Fact:

The colder the room you sleep in, the better the chances are that you'll have a bad dream.
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43. "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."

-- Thomas Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943
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44. "When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them."

-- Rodney Dangerfield
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45. Strange Law:

In Atlanta, Georgia, it is illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
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46. Strange Law:

In Saudi Arabia, a woman reportedly may divorce her husband if he does not keep her supplied with coffee.
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47. Strange Fact:

Monks in the 16th century recorded seeing a giant explosion on the side of the Moon. It most likely was a large meteor that slammed into the Moon and left a large crater.
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48. "Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life."

-- Tom Waits
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49. World Record:

As of September 1998, the highest recorded mileage for a car was 1,615,000 miles for a 1966 Volvo P-1800.
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50. Strange Fact:

Dog owners in Turin, Italy can be fined up to $650 if they don't walk their dog at least three times a day.
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51. "People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of their character."

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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52. "The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time."

-- Bertrand Russell
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53. Strange Fact:

At a glance, the Celsius scale makes more sense than the Fahrenheit scale for temperature measuring. But its creator, Anders Celsius, was an strange scientist. When he first developed his scale, he made freezing 100 degrees and boiling 0 degrees, or upside down. No one dared point this out to him, so fellow scientists waited until Celsius died to change the scale to what it is today.
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54. My top 10 favorite movies:

Requiem for a Dream, Voyage of the Damned, Chasing Amy, Bring It On, Imitation of Life, Lost in Translation, Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story, Mon Oncle, The Blues Brothers, The Sorrow and the Pity
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55. "Whenever I date a guy, I think, ‘Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?’”

-- Rita Rudner
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56. "I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy."

-- J. D. Salinger
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57. "Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter."

-- William Ralph Inge
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58. Historical Fact:

During the California Gold Rush of 1849 miners sent their laundry to Honolulu for washing and pressing. Due to the extremely high costs in California during these boom years it was deemed more feasible to send the shirts to Hawaii for servicing.
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59. "Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing at all ridiculous about eating dinner at midnight, and the Italians should never, ever have been let in on the invention of the motor car."

-- Bill Bryson
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60. "I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves."

-- August Strindberg
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61. World Record:

At 12 years old, an African named Ernest Loftus made his first entry in his diary and continued everyday for 91 years.
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62. "The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane."

-- Mark Twain
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63. "Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more."

-- Mark Twain
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64. "Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children."

-- George Bernard Shaw
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65. "To love deeply in one direction makes us more loving in all others."

-- Anne-Sophie Swetchine
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66. "Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us."

-- Bill Watterson (Calvin and Hobbes)
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67. Strange Fact:

Hailed as a wonder drug in the late nineteenth century, cocaine was outlawed in the United States in 1914.
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68. "I believe that people would be alive today if there were a death penalty."

-- Nancy Reagan
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69. "My cousin just died. He was only 19. He got stung by a bee - the natural enemy of a tightrope walker."

-- Dan Rather (News anchorman)
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70. "Apparently the new high-tech Star Wars toys will be in stores any day now. The toys can talk and are interactive, so they can be easily distinguished from Star Wars fans."

-- Conan O'Brien
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71. "American and British troops handed out food to hundreds of Iraqis. Not surprisingly, Iraqis handed the British food back."

-- Conan O'Brien
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72. Strange Law:

A local ordinance in Atwoodville, Connecticut prohibits people from playing Scrabble while waiting for a politician to speak.
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73. Strange Law:

It's illegal in Alabama to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.
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74. "My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."

-- Ellen DeGeneres
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75. "To be mature means to face, and not evade, every fresh crisis that comes."

-- Fritz Kunkel
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76. "Without censorship, things can get terribly confused in the public mind."

-- General William Westmoreland
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77. "Write a wise saying and your name will live forever."

-- Anonymous
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78. "I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."

-- Rodney Dangerfield
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79. "The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself."

-- Mark Twain
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80. "I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves."

-- Jerry Garcia (Grateful Dead)
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81. "Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler."

-- W.C. Fields
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82. "I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes, I had one thousand and sixty."

-- Imelda Marcos
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83. "You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club."

-- Jack London
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84. "I do not feel obliged to believe that same God who endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect had intended for us to forgo their use."

-- Galileo Galilei
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85. "Democracy is an abuse of statistics."

-- Jorge Luis Borges
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86. "War is much too serious a matter to be entrusted to the military."

-- Georges Clemenceau
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87. "I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter."

-- Steven Wright
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88. "We can't all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by."

-- Will Rogers
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89. Strange Law:

In 1845 Boston had an ordinance banning bathing unless you had a doctor's prescription.
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90. "By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher...and that is a good thing for any man."

-- Socrates
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91. Strange Law:

Chewing gum is outlawed in Singapore because it is a means of "tainting an environment free of dirt."
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92. "My girlfriend is weird. She asked me, 'If you could know how and when you were going to die, would you want to know?' I said, 'No.' She said, "Okay, then forget it."

-- Steven Wright
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93. "Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction."

-Blaise Pascal
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94. "Good artists copy; great artists steal"

-- Pablo Picasso
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95. "I've sometimes thought of marrying, and then I've thought again."

-- Noel Coward
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96. "My interest in the future is because I am going to spend the rest of my life there."

-- Charles F. Kettering
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97. "Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do."

-- Jean-Paul Sartre
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98. "The most wasted of all days is one without laughter."

-- EE Cummings
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99. In History:

On August 9th 1942 the U.S. - Canada border is defined by the Webster-Ashburton Treaty.
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100. "Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."

-- Dave Barry
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